Shortly after we found out that Baby 'Berts is a she, Joel and I were sitting at the dinner table daydreaming... imagining who she'd be, what she'd look like. Joel made a comment about having to wrap his brain around me being a mom to a girl. He said he always pictured me raising rough and tumble boys. I agreed immediately. And ever since then, I've been trying to wrap my brain around it, too.
Raising a daughter is such a terrifying responsibility. Such a mind-boggling privilege.
I've always felt growing a girl would be so difficult. Her tender little heart. Her breakable body. Teaching her about modesty, about heartache, about being honest, about girl friendships, about fractions, about taking care of herself, about God's word, about writing good narratives. Modeling wisdom, kindness, loyalty, sacrifice- things I find myself failing at daily, but that are so incredibly crucial.
But then I think about my own mom. And how she did a pretty amazing job raising me (along with my dad, of course!), which I'm sure was a very daunting and trying job at times. The way she prayed and prayed and listened and listened. The truth she spoke. The times she forgave me. The times she disciplined me and taught me what was right.
And I think about my friends who are growing little ladies now. Who patiently explain the same things over and over. Who paint those tiny toenails. Who dress up and pretend. Who pray and discipline and speak truth into little minds and hearts.
Then I get excited. I get so so so happy to consider painting little nails and brushing soft hairs and dressing skinny legs. I get a shiver of enthusiasm to think about telling my daughter how her daddy pursued me and won my heart and swept me off my feet. I get tears in my eyes imagining the times we'll read picture books and pray and sing bedtime hymns. So basically I'm scared and thrilled. All at the same time.
Rachael puts it well here... "I look forward to opening my heart up a bit wider to the idea that maybe, just maybe… I’m perfectly cut out to be a mom of girls after all."